When I read the prompt for this blog post and how it dealt with the similarities and differences between Puritan women and women today, my first thought was, "Oh, it's completely different! Women have so much more freedom today that they did then!" But then as I started to really think about it, I started to see otherwise.
I am from a (really) small town in Texas, where everyone is pretty conservative for the most part. I started to compare life there and the way women are viewed to Puritan women and how their actions were viewed. In my high school, girls who got around were viewed as just that: girls who got around. It's not a good reputation to have. Everyone knew about it, talked about it, and judged these girls. Everyone in the community, including teachers and parents, had their disapproving thoughts about the girls with the wild lifestyles, and it was obvious. No, they weren't booing them in the grocery store, but the looks weren't hidden. This made me think about how women in today's society (I guess it kind of depends on where you are exactly) don't have it much easier than women in Puritan times. No, they aren't getting hung anymore, but I bet the harsh looks they receive day after day start to get old. People still have judgements about the "easy" girls, and they are hardly ever good ones.
When my I was in middle school, my best friend had an older sister who was a senior in high school. At the beginning of the school year, she accidentally got pregnant. She married the father, but they divorced about a year later. Now, she is working and raising her son, pretty much on her own. Besides paying for child support, I don't think the father has much to do with his son. When she had the child, her parents always used her as an example to her younger sister (my best friend) about what not to do, and how constant partying, drinking, and not obeying their rules will lead to a situation like her sister is in. And might I mention that they never mentioned the father of the child. The blame was always set on the mother, as if the father didn't do much wrong. This reminded me of how the ministers would use the "evil" Puritan women as examples to young women about how not to act.
I definitely think society has created a new punishment for the girls with the "friendly" reputations. Although women today have more freedom and rights than women in the Puritan times, when a girl "runs around" with a lot of guys, its definitely looked down upon. In my high school, these girls were treated with much less respect. This is something I still see today on TCU's campus. Certain girls have those reputations, and people treat them poorly for it. I guess I can't really say how it affects those girls emotionally, but I couldn't imagine it not having some kind of negative effect. Although it's true how there are girls here at TCU like this, I think it's true everywhere. I don't think it has much to do with the fact that we are on a college campus. Wherever you go, there will be the same girls, with the same reputations, receiving the same cold looks. So yes, times have changed, but I don't really think judgements have much.
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5 comments:
Hi Katie,
I completely agree with you: There is a double-standard when it comes to pregnancy, sexual promiscuity, and the like. It's always seemed so illogical to me. For example, we've mentioned in class that although sexually "liberal" behavior was frowned upon, it was much worse for a woman to "stray from the path of righteousness" than a man; society turned a deaf ear when it came to male sexual promiscuity. What confuses me is... who did they think these men were sleeping with??? A woman would have to "fall" for a man to be satisfied, yet she would be punished more severely for the same actions. Weird.
Katie, I do wonder about how the "looks" and "social ostracism" affects the girls on campus at TCU. Have you ever thought that if a guy runs around with a bunch of girls is a less than virtuous young man? I doubt it. He is praised for being smart enough to hang out with lots of girls!! There you have it....the double standard rules.
When I was growing up, one of my friends became pregnant in the 7th grade. I was devastated. I was devastated not so much because she was pregnant, but how her life changed. She was so sweet and funny and great to be with. Our lives separated at that point and I still wonder how she is doing. My sweet friend was ridiculed and put out to pasture.
Reading these infanticide narratives with questionable authorship bring to light the double standards applied to women both then and now.
Hi, Katie,
I really like the example you gave about your best friend's sister getting pregnant in high school. I agree with you that it's very similar to the warning to young people in the Puritan narratives. The phrase you used that jumped out at me was the parents' mantra about "not obeying their rules." I think that was at the heart of the Puritan agenda. Of course, everyone was encouraged to act morally for the sake of their own souls, but it was also VERY much about maintaining the patriarchal system. Promiscuous women couldn't be let off the hook, because that would weaken male authority and the male-dominated social structure.
Your post was great--it gave me a lot to think about!
Katie,
I also enjoyed your post. You mentioned being from a small town, which reinforced my belief that population size has a lot to do with how harshly a woman is judged for her sexual activity level. Maybe women in New York and L.A. face fewer repercussions from having "one night stands" because it's just harder to keep track of who's up to what in a big city (although attitudes probably have something to do with it, too). Puritan communities were tiny by today's standards, so word traveled fast. Maybe the fact the lived in a smaller world is at least partly to blame for their prudish reputation.
Hey Katie. I liked reading your post and that you used a personal experience. I actually have a few friends that have a similar history and their lives have never been able to get to be "normal" because it was a small town. I definitely agree with you, though. For some reason, men are still getting an out on a lot of situations like that and leaving the mother to do things on her own. It's very sad and I hate it that women have to go through that sometimes. Everyone makes mistakes and in a situation like that it definitely took two to tango, so I don't think the boys should be excluded of responsibility and consequence.
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